Everyone loves a payday. Validation for a job well done. Recognition for accomplishments. Endorsements for good behavior.
The payoffs come in many forms. They are compliments from loved ones, awards for good measure, and accolades for being honorable.
There are payments for services rendered, bonuses, incentives, motivations, and stimulants. There is nurturing, caring, promoting, developing and strengthening. There is looking outside ourselves for formal cognizance and there is looking within ourselves for our own self-preservation.
If we don’t allow people to hold us up, we can never be let down. Self discovery will cast a light on the elements within ourselves that inspire us to be responsible for who we have become. Perception is in the eye of the beholder and it’s time to live up to our standards.
Change begins when we love ourselves enough hear the heartbeats in our story.
Important question 101: After your payoff do you feel elevated or depleted?
If you work out hard for an entire week why would your payoff at the end of the week be a fat greasy cheeseburger with french fries? Is that a celebration or self deterioration?
If you work out hard for an entire week why wouldn’t your payoff be a nice 30 or 60 minute massage to comfort your aching muscles?
It doesn’t matter if your payoff has been depleting or encouraging. Our bodies and our minds get used to both kinds and our subconscious does not discriminate. It will follow along like Simon Says engaging in whatever payoff pattern we employ.
It’s time to try something different. Something new. A payday that benefits us in all the right ways.
You have to look at what you want to change and have a replacement ready for that in which we have the power to change. I always find it best to work in lists and columns so you can list the pattern or activity on one side and the payoff counterpart on the other. This time we can make a third column and add what our new payoff is going to be.
Remember repetition breeds success. Any habit can be adjusted, changed or replaced in 21 days. Be honest with yourself so you can invoke the change you wish to see in your life. The new emotional paydays will be worth the effort.
photo courtesy of http://cheetahgurlz90.blogspot.com/2011/01/how-to-nurture-your-relationship.html