It’s a Monday morning on the coast and there is not a cloud in sight. The smell of rain is gone and the cleansing came as promised. Being the over thinker has my brain working overdrive and the off button seems to be stuck. Giving up is not an option and the creativity is here to help. The dryer bustles in the background and the smell of dryer sheets is instantly calming. The sound of a flute joining the piano soothes my indecisive temperament while the perilous nature of uncertainty makes it’s own assessment. Birds take flight in unison and my puppy let’s me love him. The to-do list grows a mind of it’s own and you wonder why everything takes so long. You go out of your way to make things right but the light won’t turn green and the traffic can get backed up for miles. No one can let you down if you don’t allow them to hold you up. Another birthday comes and goes and breakfast isn’t ready yet. The iambic pentameter tries to find me today and that’s okay. We have come a long way from pictograms and it’s just another day. History has a way of repeating itself if you let it in while breaking the binds of pattern can release you from sin. A society based in what’s it all for and how far have we really come? Are you willing to join your mirror or are you still wondering where you’re from? Sometimes a self inflicted lullaby can set you free as if you were a new found miracle left out for the world to see. Dr. Seuss had it right when he found the Wocket in his pocket and in closing he let us know… “I don’t care if you believe it. And I hope we never leave it”.
I dreamt of a key that carried a message. The feel of it in my hand was typical cold nickel plated brass but mixed with old world charm. It left me wondering if I had missed something. Where had I left those memories again? Holding it up to the light caused the beams to cast a shadow on the wall in the shape of a heart. An emblem of love? Counting the teeth as if the dips and valleys were symbolic in someway I couldn’t help but wonder if they would be the perfect match to a keyhole somewhere I didn’t have directions to.
Was this synonymous of the roller coaster I’ve always felt I was on or was it literally trying to lead the way? It must have known its own address. This was an interesting test.
It wasn’t quite a skeleton key and I innately knew it wouldn’t just open any door. Maybe this was a gateway to the future. Perhaps this was my way out. From Neverland to Wonderland and no more living between lives. How many lifetimes do we live before we get it right anyway? I hope I don’t end up in some house of mirrors and have to face them all. What would I say?
Another part of myself seemed to be trying to cross the barriers of the speed of light. If it’s one at a time and comes with answers, that I can handle. I needed answers. But no such luck. Some journeys are meant to be tackled alone. What kind of doorway was I looking for? Stepping into the confidence of my resource cloak I took my first step crossing through the threshold of where yesterday meets tomorrow. Here I find myself looking in the mirror, quizzically. Hmmm. With one last look I head out my own door with key in hand knowing that if I leap the net will appear.
To keep my life from being someone else’s metaphor I embrace my courage. The key seems to hold the same principals as a compass. Who am I not to follow?
It seems to be taking me on a walkabout. A journey where there is no past and no future. The silence is like music played from another kind of keys and it makes me smile. I’m not in a hurry and I don’t feel lost. I’m alone but I’m not lonely. I feel a love that seems to be emanating from my core. Oh that’s what this feels like. How compassionate and unabridged. Is this what I’ve been looking for outside myself? I was so mistaken.
Somehow I had lost my way. Got wrapped up in the fabrication of misinformation instilled in me in childhood. Blinded by transference and wounded by disregard. All of a sudden I get a strong sense that I have a calling. We all do.
My attention is immediately drawn to the key in my hand now glistening with anticipation. In my peripheral vision I am distracted by a sunbeam of light impressively bright and welcoming. It is radiating from the keyhole of a simple and yet familiar doorway.
Instinctively I reach my hand toward the door and the key fits perfectly. As I slowly open the door and peak behind it my reflection greets me in the mirror. That feeling comes over me again as I put down the key. I’m exactly where I am supposed to be. I am the love I’ve been searching for. I was here all along. We all are.
“In oneself lies the whole world and if you know how to look and learn, the door is there and the key is in your hand. Nobody on earth can give you either the key or the door to open, except yourself.“
~Jiddu Krishnamurti, as quoted in Perfecting Ourselves: Coordinating Body, Mind, and Spirit
“Be careful of your thoughts; they may become words at any moment.”
–Ira Gassen
Having been on this journey with me, the W Chaser, has probably meant that you haven’t always known where this is going. We have thrown caution to the wind and we have tried to adhere to the belief that if we leap, the net really will appear. There have been times when we wallowed, cried, and reeled at the cards we were dealt. And there have been times when we laughed, shared and marveled at our ability to pick ourselves up again.
Sharing our experiences and encouraging each other is like watering the botanical gardens and watching the flowers bloom into a beautiful array of colorful diversity.
Life is as amazing as we choose to make it. Change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a process. It’s an exercise in patience. It’s the ability to share. It’s spreading the word.
Words are ever powerful so we must think clearly and carefully before we speak and we must be intentional in our communications. Words must be chosen carefully.
“The trouble with talking too fast is you may say something you haven’t thought of yet“.
–Ann Landers
We can’t fall prey to our past or give in to the story we created for ourselves. We must use our thoughts and our words to change our story. We are moving on from the past. And now in this moment, there’s no room for excess baggage. We are only allowed one carry on. So let’s fill it with the necessary words and thoughts that will assist us in our personal and global spiritual evolution and leave the rest behind us.
We need to be determined to stay present so we can find our place in the collective whole. Use your thoughts to accept where you are now. Know that every minute is what it is. Be conscious and welcome the coincidences that follow. Use them as the clues that will take you where you need to be. These clues will help you evolve into a better person.
Let your thoughts lead you away from resistance and into acceptance. Acceptance of what is will set you free and freedom is empowerment and empowerment leads to greatness.
Make your thoughts count so your words will matter.
I’ve been working too much and let myself get off balance. When I’m off balance I can’t find my words and my thoughts are all over the place. I’m easily frustrated by that which I don’t understand and my tolerance goes out the window. I have writers block again and it’s a weird thing to have happen when all you need is to get the feelings out on paper but your words won’t help you.
I have some time off from work which is already lending itself to yoga, meditation and self fulfilling prophecy. Today marks another day for starting over, starting fresh and seeing where it will take me. Being the W Chaser serves me well in that I can’t ever settle and I can’t ever give up. And even though I have to know, more importantly I have to let go.
When I let the truth claim me, my humble nature reminds me that I’m vulnerable. Writing out my feelings is how I can communicate without fear of rejection, fear of judgment, fear of unrequited feelings, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of life, or fear of death. There’s nothing to fear but fear itself anyway. I choose to not fear at all. I choose to live in the moment and to go for it at all costs.
My truth finds me admitting that while I know what it’s like to have someone like you but you don’t feel the same, I also know what it feels like to like someone who doesn’t feel the same. Life has a funny way of teaching us about who we are, how we treat people and more importantly who we want to be.
Yes, I am my own worst dichotomy (I think most of us tend to be). I tend to be awkward, verbally clumsy and unsure of myself and yet I’m sexy, strong and confident. I realize the importance in knowing what part you play in a situation but also what part another person plays. Some people push buttons in us we didn’t even know we had, unresponsive crazy makers and you’re reminded of someone who past away.
Sometimes history has a funny way of repeating itself and some people don’t know how to express themselves. Some people create circumstances to prove themselves right and they don’t even know they’re doing it. We don’t always realize the power we hold. Well I want to get it right.
Communication is the crux that holds it all together.
For the most part, everyone has access to their own very vivid imagination. And even if you don’t always realize you are doing it, you are retrieving information from your own mind and filling in the blanks. This can reek chaos on your life and your relationships. You don’t want your life to be a random game of telephone do you?
Asking questions can be unnerving. You don’t want people to think you aren’t listening or you don’t understand or that you’re prying. But in order for the lines of communication to work you must be open to the give and take of information. The only way to get the facts is to ask the questions. You don’t want to make assumptions.
Making assumptions means you don’t have all the answers to form a conclusion so you are going to add your own fillers to make the story make sense. The implications of this kind of conjecture leads to disagreements and arguments and it can even lead to distrust.
To help in the process of transforming your life you need to find the courage to inquire. When you express with each other what your wants are you are not leaving any chance for misunderstandings. When you are clear with each other you avoid drama. When you are honest with each other you invoke confidence. Without room for assumptions the truths are exhibited and trust is born.
Also, keep in mind that you must be accountable too. Skirting around issues, giving half truths or not telling a whole story leads to insecurity. Some people are prone to this way of communicating. This is not well suited for everyone. People speak different languages and come with their own versions of baggage and the best way to get through life is to find people who’s baggage matches yours.
It is also important that you honor your boundaries and you trust your intuition. If you feel someone isn’t being honest with you and you find yourself making assumptions than maybe your lines of communication are not compatible or maybe that person just isn’t worthy of your trust. This is a possibility not to be overlooked. Why would you want to be with someone who isn’t honest with you?
Relationships and friendships are meant to be uplifting and inspiring not draining and confusing. By now you should know the difference. Heed the warnings of the red flags and let your intuition give you the insight into your own happiness. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and don’t be afraid to walk away.
Healthy communication is a key to long term exuberance and when this door opens anything is possible.
Are your lines open?
To read more about assumptions check out the book The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz.
It’s a Monday morning on the coast and there is not a cloud in sight. The smell of rain is gone and the cleansing came as promised. Being the over thinker has my brain working overdrive and the off button seems to be stuck. Giving up is not an option and the creativity is here to help. The dryer bustles in the background and the smell of dryer sheets is instantly calming. The sound of a flute joining the piano soothes my indecisive temperament while the perilous nature of uncertainty makes it’s own assessment. Birds take flight in unison and my puppy let’s me love him. The to-do list grows a mind of it’s own and you wonder why everything takes so long. You go out of your way to make things right but the light won’t turn green and the traffic can get backed up for miles. No one can let you down if you don’t allow them to hold you up. Another birthday comes and goes and breakfast isn’t ready yet. The iambic pentameter tries to find me today and that’s okay. We have come a long way from pictograms and it’s just another day. History has a way of repeating itself if you let it in while breaking the binds of pattern can release you from sin. A society based in what’s it all for and how far have we really come? Are you willing to join your mirror or are you still wondering where you’re from? Sometimes a self inflicted lullaby can set you free as if you were a new found miracle left out for the world to see. Dr. Seuss had it right when he found the Wocket in his pocket and in closing he let us know… “I don’t care if you believe it. And I hope we never leave it”.
